Hi there

Some background before I continue seeing that this is my first post.

24 year old male Australian w/ a partner. Have recently committed to the practice and have a few questions about the Key Sound articulation:

1) When rolling the Key Sound I find that my back and shoulders tense as I complete the exhale.. is this normal or I am focusing too much on pushing the exhale to complete the sound?

2) I have had a few sessions now with focus on articulation. I listen to the 20 min demonstration and synchronise a breath after Jacks Key Sound. I've had four sessions with mixed results (nothing spectacular bar one wave of joy that I had in my second session). Is it wise to continue focusing on articulation before introducing the caress or shall I go ahead and bring in the caress before each Key Sound?


Cheers

Great!

G'day, mate, and to your Sheila!

Yes you are pushing too hard.

There should be no forcing whatsoever... you relax into the process.

Next step is between the ears - i.e., the cognitive traps that inhibit progress.

The most common form of this most frequent trap is:

"I did experience 'x' but it wasn't very 'y' "

The wave of joy IS a very big deal. It is NOT trivial!!!

What it means is that the process is beginning to work!

BUT you slipped into that pitfall of "yes, but it wasn't very much. Therefore, nothing is happening, I'm not getting anywhere," etc. etc.

Every tiny Echo Effect is a big deal - especially in the beginning!

It means for a few moments there, you were "on the signal line" as it were. That is, that you did do something correctly - effectively.

Keep in mind our analogy (suggested by a UK woman named Andi - you can search the Forum for her comments) of a timid fawn that is just starting to emerge from cover.

If you say Oh! there it is! And start chasing after it - off it goes! Back into hiding...

But instead, if you stay calm, and adopt an attitude of what in Zen practice is referred to as Beginner's Mind, and just gently continue your practice, more of those little tingles, or waves of joy, or warm (or cool) flushes of energy, or goosebumps or ??? will start to happen.

Those are the signs of the awakening of the response.

Don't try to make it happen... Just stay with a very relaxed and relaxing practice, and do not force the Key Sound.

The Key Sound is more like a very relaxed, husky sigh.

Explore it both ways and find out which elicits more of those initially faint, quote subtle, and perhaps not even (in the beginning) particularly erotic sensations such as I described above.

Those are indeed the Echo Effects. That spontaneous wave of joy you mentioned is a great example of an Echo Effect!

Those Echo Effects let you know when you are on track.

A very important concept is relaxation plus acceptance without negative judgments or evaluations (the latter which I refer to as mind noise that is, brain static).

Likewise... relaxation plus no forcing, no trying to make it happen.

Instead relax and allow the Echo Effects to manifest, however subtle.

And instead of grading them as not much or nothing spectacular, etc. etc., applaud them!


Same to you mate! I look forward to seeing your Blog.

Wishing you and your Sweetie all the very best that life has to offer,
Jack

Thanks for the reply Jack.

I can see how the noise & traps have got in the way. I'll be more allowing and relaxing with myself. It'll also be a fun challenge destructing the habit of self-imposed expectation and judgment.

I'll be keeping written record of my journey and will most likely start a blog in the coming weeks. Be on the lookout