I agree with Airn. What an amazing conversation and subject! It's only 10am and I've already learned something today!
One comment that really struck a chord with me was the following:
"We lack coming-of-age ceremonies, rituals and procedures that signify to us in a symbolic way that we are Men. I think this contributes to a sense of not knowing who we are as men, leading to a feeling of "Am I really a Man?" Many behaviours in our society could be seen as attempts to prove this."
I am struck by the fact of the truth in this statement. How much have we been robbed of this in our society? We do need, I need, an event/ milestone whereby we can look back and say, "Yes I am a MAN." We need that "Hoorah," that sense of manly tenacity put back in us! No wonder so many men don't know who they are and why so many men have the stereotypical 'mid-life crisis.'
There's a great book called "Wild At Heart" by John Eldridge that talks about being a man. It talks about how men try to 'validate' themselves by being macho, having numerous women conquests, buying the bigger boat etc. and it goes on to describe what every man needs: "A battle to fight, an adventure to live and a beauty to rescue."
I am completely dumbfounded and in an almost state of shock as I write this thread. Through this thread and the quote above I have realized, just now, what I have been missing; why I have gone skydiving, why I want to join the army or backpack through South America. I know now why I have kind of "floundered" through life. My father never taught me to be a man, never took me through that 'right of passage' into manhood. Wow! What an amazing thing for a father and son to share with each other! Thank you all for this great conversation and the Truth that has awakened in me! Hua!