Gold Nugget - Newbie tips - Learning to understand the lessons and guidance from our subconscious
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Originally Posted by even
Hi again, and thanks for your reply!
I have to say, it was an interesting observation your made there! I suppose I did mean excited, instead of exited, and the spell-checker didn't catch it either.
On the other side, the slip exited actually fits perfectly to this setting, since I was doing exactly that; exiting the exciting feeling I had at this moment! I'm not sure what this actually tells me, but I remember that I got afraid of losing the good (exciting) feeling on this successfully session.
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I'm
very glad to see you taking advantage of the insights being offered you by your subconscious through these kinds of slips! They are indeed very valuable!
Note also that you said you were not sure about what it meant, and then immediately followed that with what appears to me as a very accurate understanding of precisely what it
DOES likely mean!
That's an important pattern to be aware, and it's very common for most of us - the way we tend to discount or devalue the important clues to increased awareness and personal growth that our subconscious is offering us very very often!
No blame or need to feel bad or guilty about it - it's the result of our enculturation... And this is an opportunity for us to free ourselves from those restrictive bonds and access that additional insight and guidance from our very wise subconscious!
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Thanks! It's encouraging to hear that!
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You're quite welcome!
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This slip was a bit harder to find, but I suppose you mean that I should have written two instead of to? The first minutes I looked at this, I didn't see anything special about it at all. Were almost ready to ask what you are talking about, until I noticed a detail: I'm actually writing here (because of the slip) that I find it hard to compare these two orgasmic types to sensations. Interesting! I find it hard to analyze myself, but maybe it's a sign of a sort of a emotional blockage against these feelings?
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Yes, again, this resistance is in my opinion a result of our enculturation - how our culture has encouraged us to ignore and devalue these important insights and clues to increased self-awareness.
There's a great example of this in the
highly allegorical story and film: The Wizard of Oz, where the booming voice of the great Oz (our ego) keeps bellowing:
Ignore the man behind the curtain! Ignore the man behind the curtain! who in fact was the one pulling all of the levers controlling the show!
I think your interpretation of that slip is spot on!
So I encourage you to trust in your ability to
get the message... the GIFT, really... of these so-called slips!
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I'm using a light touch of the nipple as a caress.
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That's a perfect example of correct practice! I also encourage you to explore other areas of pleasurable touch, including of course, your genital area when you're comfortable doing so.
I think it's good to offer your response system some variety, with the benefit of your becoming better acquainted with your sensual self.
Overall, our system tends to like variety!
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By distraction, I mean that the caress takes some of the focus away from the relaxation, so that I become a little less relaxed.
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Well keep in mind that what you are labeling as
distraction may very possibly be an
increase in arousal... and that's what this practice is about... Learning how to
allow sensual- and erotic arousal to increase, but without the high stimulation that tends to trigger the ejaculation reflex...
That's the core of the Big Secret of my discovery of The Multiple Orgasm Trigger™! 
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I notice that if I use a single caress before every KS, the good sensations (in the lower abs) tend to become less intense over time compared to not using the caress.
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Very good observation!!!
The drop in response can be a request from your erotic self for a little variety!
That is, a little less stimulation, maybe every
other- or every few cycles of Key Sound plus relaxing breathing.
It can also be a signal to caress some
other pleasurable area of your body.
As these responses awaken, you will find that more and more of your entire body become pleasurably responsive in this way... Hence the title of Walt Whitman's lovely poem:
I sing the body electric from his book
Leaves of Grass!
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Also the nipple become less sensitive over time when having a high frequency of these caresses. That is the main reason I have labeled these caresses as a "distraction".
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I understand, and invite you to quit assigning a negative label to the experience -
due to the negative emotions that tend to accompany such a label - and just
gratefully receive this awareness as a request from your deeper sensual wisdom for a little variety!
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On the other hand, it seems to work much better to use a single caress more infrequently, maybe only before every 3-4 KS-sound or so. That way, the nipple does seem to keep its sensitivity through the session as well.
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Yes! That too seems to be working well for you, and I like that you responded in that way! Just combine
that response with also exploring single caresses of other areas from time to time!
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The reason I did call the caresses a distraction in the first place, is because the good sensations didn't increase as a result from using these caresses. And I'm assuming that everything that is dampening the good sensations is a sort of a distraction, and thus the caress is a distraction. But it may be that it's wrong to look at it in that way?
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I would say that the term
distraction is likely to have negative emotions associated with it, and I invite you to
reframe that is... to
relable and
reinterpret such awareness as simply
Deeper Body Wisdom and Intelligence COACHING you gently to introduce a little more variety and
allow your arousal to increase!
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The first term I think of, is: "new feelings". But I'm not sure if that fits entirely.
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Although it may not fit
entirely (whatever that means! lol), what
shift in emotional response do you notice when instead of using
distraction you use
new feelings?
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I don't think it is a emotional feeling that is the distraction in itself. It's more that I labeled the caress as a distraction, since the caress tend to give a decrease in the good sensations. So I'm not sure if your suggestion over applies to my situation?
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Trust me... It does! And... notice what your subconscious is teaching you via the slip in that last sentence (or at least the language you used in that sentence):
If you're not sure that my suggestion over applies, then perhaps - just perchance - it
does apply!
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I tried this exercise, and it did give some negative feelings. A sort of "not reaching up", or "not good enough"-feelings.
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That's a very helpful awareness - and an
opportunity for another step of growth in learning this skill!
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The positive variant of the sentence I could come up with, is: "I often find myself in peace with my analyzing and thinking when it's working".
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Cool!
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Also have to say that I like the last sentence much better than my original one
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QED! (Just click that link if you're not sure what I mean by that!
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When I hear those promptings (mind noise), I try to just realize that I experienced them, and let them fly away on their own without giving them any attention. I believe that all these thoughts/promptings is just a distraction, a makes you less relaxed.
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Well, you DO seem to be attached to labeling experience as distraction. I want to invite you - as an exercise in possibly increasing self-awareness - that nearly every time you find yourself labeling something as a distraction - to ask yourself instead: What might be the positive message for me here? What lesson am I being offered?
Sometimes it may be mind noise, but sometimes it may be an issue that is
asking for healing and resolution - in order that you may continue your Adventure of
opening further to pleasure.
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The last question was a bit hard to answer I think.
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I understand... but it may be worth it!
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These are all good questions I think. I will try it out, and see what happens.
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That is a perfect attitude for this practice imho!
You are
very welcome!
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I have tried to do the ksmo-session just after this meditation. And it seems to work quite well, as the meditation gives a very relaxed state.
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Excellent!
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That is a good question, although I'm not sure how to do that.
I'm wondering about that too. I will try it, and see what happens.
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Yes... just stay open to learning more... To me, that is the most productive way to explore your further opening in this process of self-discovery and erotic awakening!
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English is not my first language,
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Well you are certainly doing VERY well with it! Lucky for me and the other readers - and thank you VERY much for making that effort!
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so I guess that may explain this one.
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Maybe... Yet maybe there is more for you here, and I'm very glad you're open to that possibility as demonstrated by your remarks that follow here:
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Although I know it's named "I am", and not "I are". On the other hand, it may be that you're correct about these "allies".
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...And if perchance I am correct, what then? What benefits might you accrue from that possible fact? What
opportunities?
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This makes perfect sense to me.
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Wonderful!!!
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Thanks again for taking your time to answer my questions I have to admit that many of your questions was a bit difficult to give good answer to
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Thanks for making the effort!!!
Wishing you all the very best that life has to offer,
Jack