Arrgh. It's comments like that that gets me. I know it was somewhat in jest, but who cares if we can do some mundane task? It seems like the things we do well are meaningless, whereas the things women do well or experience more fully are the things both sexes highly value.

It seems like we men are the stagehands of life, and women are the stars. We make sure everyone gets food, clothing, shelter and take care of physical obstacles, and they get to reap all the benefits. It's like we are robots compared to them. It's not that I hate women for this. I still like them. But I feel like I'm massively missing out because men are physically incapable of enjoying life as much as women. They get far more pleasure out of sex, like orders of magnitude more, they love more, feel love more, they are better at nearly anything that doesn't involve brute strength. Sure they feel more pain, heartbreak, emotional anguish undoubtedly. But I'd take some of that if it meant not being stuck in the mundanity of being a male.

This whole KSMO thing. We have to relax, which is ok, and do specific sounds, then we get some orgasms, maybe. And this can't even carry over to regular thrusting sex right? But women get mind-blowing orgasms, and they don't have to practice any special techniques. They don't have to order any seminar online. They just read a few web pages online that tell them what to do and it's pretty straight forward and they get these experiences that dwarf ours. And they can get them in normal sex, one after another until they decide to stop and they can just go on and on and on. We need sex, but they love it.

It just feels like the purpose of men is to provide for women's pleasure, inside and outside of the bedroom. They have more nerves on their skin, so they feel touch more. They have estrogen, so that touch means more because estrogen enhances oxytocin, the love hormone, hence they also feel love more.

Last night I was thinking that maybe this is a nightmare that I was about to wake up from. Or maybe life is some sort of test, to see how I deal with this, or a lesson, so that I can learn something.

I just feel so empty and hopeless like no matter how good life may get, I will never experience the physical and emotional pleasures women are capable of. How can it be that they get it so much better? And how does this balance out ultimately?