laly's Liberation-journey to emotional freedom

HI...I've been through the emotional wringer the past few weeks. I shared some of it last night in the 1st chat session: Last longer in bed using the Multiple Orgasm Trigger™.

I'll try to explain more of what I said in chat.

For the one workshop, I explained that I had great fears in attending because of a few reasons : 1. the great number of people I saw signed up for the event , 2: My concerns over being able to hear the speaker (I am deaf in my right ear, severely impaired in the left) , 3. My HUGE concerns over the # of people attending and being in a closed room with them possibly triggering a panic attack.

Once signed in and got in the room, my thoughts were "OHH MY GOD!!" and I started to feel myself panic. But I didn't, just re-centered myself and walked on. Yes, I did bring my hearing aid, but with so many people talking I ended up with a HUGE headache in a few hours, so I took it out and the rest of the workshop relied ALOT on my lip reading abilities.
At one point I was far enough in the back that I couldn't hear the speaker or read his lips, and I took a HUGE step of courage and asked about seating closer to the stage. I was taken to the head organizer and Richard was really sweet ya all--gave me a special VIP tag and lead me right up to seating in front of the stage. Once I saw where he was going- I nearly wept. I just thanked him and he said from now on this is the area where I was sit.

I talked to myself and I chose to "be" a part of the workshop rather than hide and be afraid n hide. The energy shift was phenomenal. I put a lil label on my name badge letting people know I was severely hearing impaired just so I didn't have to keep repeating it every time. Everyone was just so helpful and outgoing, it made participating more fun. They were very helpful too, when I missed something the speaker said.

The energy in the room was UNbelieveable!! During breaks, I'd get up n move to loosen the stiffness and then I'd hear the music being played (I had to be close to the speakers on stage to hear it clearly) and I would dance!! yeah DANCE in front and not care who was watching me. Just feel the music and let my body sway n boogie.

As I mentioned in chat, James came up at one break -- grabbed my hand and he n I started dancing . I didnt panic-- but boy a HUGE grin and a smile and we had fun!! After that, James didnt - much to my surprise- sit far from me the rest of the workshop.

Marc-- one of the workshop co-presenters...walked by me after one break - stopped and asked me if I was coming on stage and dancing. I think my jaw dropped! A lil twinge of fear popped up but I ignored it and said "Sure Marc !" So I danced on stage in front of 600 other people n with several others. I was nervous, but I closed my eyes-put the crowd out of my mind and just listened to the music n danced .

From there on, I was in high spirits the rest of the workshop. I didn't let anything get me down...I total change from that morning. The energy n spirit of the room just filled me completely!

Almost time for church...so I'll finish this at a later time...

HUGSS